The beginning of January to the beginning of February is the busiest time for me at the Center. We start the new year out at Keystone Farm Show and helping with the Calving Corner at Pennsylvania Farm Show. As soon as the Farm Shows end, we become fully immersed in preparing for the Pennsylvania Dairy Summit, which is in the beginning of February. Having these three events stacked on top of each other can sometimes feel chaotic, but it does provide a chance to reconnect with others in the industry. Being at these events also often reminds me of “truths” I overlook in the day-to-day grind of daily life.
One truth I was reminded of several times in the past few weeks was how important it is to allow yourself to be vulnerable. As dairy producers, we are often described as tough, even stoic, and incredibly resilient. Anyone who braved the sub-zero wind chills over the past two weeks knows how brutal farming can be, and we take pride in knowing we can push through that adversity to get the work done no matter what it takes. But there are times when we as dairy producers and as an industry can better connect with others if we allow ourselves to be vulnerable.
This was best illustrated at this year’s Calving Corner when we realized twins were attempting to push through a cow’s birthing canal at the same time. Miriam Miller, who is the Calving Corner manager, and her team knew the calving was going to be a difficult one. At that point, we could have pulled the curtains shut and told the crowd to go away. Instead, the veterinarian on staff at the time and the barn manager began working to adjust the calves so they could be delivered while Miriam began talking through what was happening with the crowd. As the calving became more difficult, Miriam answered questions and worked to assure the audience that the team was doing everything possible to take care of the mother and the two baby calves.
In the end, we lost one of the calves. Any farmer knows how deeply frustrating it is to have a stillbirth. Imagine having that loss occur in front of a 1,000-person audience. Miriam often tells me that a problem calving is the biggest concern farmers have when considering whether they will provide animals for the Calving Corner. Nobody wants to be that vulnerable. However, while it was sad to lose that calf, the situation did provide a narrative to show the audience how precarious farming can be, especially when you are working with animals, and how much we as farmers care about our role in stewarding those animals.
After the delivery, I heard Miriam talking with the farmer who provided the cows that day, and she thanked him for being willing to be vulnerable. While we got a few questions, the delivery did not result in any negative pushback from the crowd nor from those watching the live stream. Mostly they commented on how we did everything we could and how they appreciated how transparent we were in the situation. It reminded me of the saying, “People don’t care what you know until they know how much you care.”
Fast forward to the Dairy Summit, I was reminded of that again when Stephanie and Hayley Painter shared the story behind their Skyr yogurt brand, which started from their desire to create a market for the milk from their farm and the farms around them just seven years ago. Today, Painterland Sisters is the fastest growing yogurt brand in the nation, now in more than 6,000 locations across the country. They talked about how, in the beginning, they would talk to anyone who would listen to get them to try the yogurt. They said one thing that helped them was the curiosity they brought to building the brand and how willing they were to build connections through admitting their vulnerabilities. “When you admit your struggles, that is what connects you to others. We all have struggles.”
We have situations every day where we have a choice to stay stoic or be vulnerable – not just when we are talking to those outside our industry but even with those who we work with day in and day out. This includes our employees, our service providers, and even our family members. Too often in farming, we are taught to stay tough and not let people see our struggles. But being resilient doesn’t mean not bending. It means bending enough so we won’t break. It could mean having that conversation that feels uncomfortable, being open and honest with your struggles, and being willing to let someone else see your vulnerabilities. In that process of bending, you might find a connection with someone in a way you never thought possible.
Editor’s Note: This column is written by Jayne Sebright, executive director for the Center for Dairy Excellence.